The Protomen’s Top Ten Favorite Burrito Joints Across the USA… So Far

So we’re in Buffalo, NY today, and we’re gonna talk about food. But right now, I want to talk directly to Mr. and Mrs. Buffalo.You may have the lock-down on your wings, and your beefs on wecks, but from what I’ve seen, you’re slacking ass in the burrito department. So, this is mostly just a list of other towns that are better at burritos than you are. Wanna fight about it?


Commander’s Top Ten Favorite Burrito Joints Across The USA… So Far

10. Some place that used to be a Beto’s – Salt Lake City, UT

We seriously don’t even know what this place is called, or where exactly it’s at, but it’s pretty great, and we were told it’s run by people who used to work at the Beto’s that used to be. Oh, and Beto’s was pretty solid, too.

9. Chile Burrito – Nashville, TN


This place has a secret weapon, and it’s unexpectedly muenster cheese. They throw a slice of that on the tortilla and heat it up on a big griddle type situation, and it just makes your whole burrito into an amazing squishy cheese explosion.

8. Tacos La Estrella – Los Angeles, CA (Highland Park)


This one is a burrito truck in Highland Park that makes a pretty fierce standard burrito. Nothing really flashy about it, it’s just bad ass.

7. Mamacita’s – Asheville, NC


This place grills their steak AFTER you order, how nuts is that? Way nuts. I don’t really have all that much to say about it, other than it’s one hell of a burrito place in a town where I wouldn’t really expect one hell of a burrito.

6. El Gran Burrito – Los Angeles, CA (Silverlake)


This place is post-load-out-2am-burrito glory. I can’t tell you why the burrito itself is so good, but it is. Their sauce game is on point, and they have those pickled jalapeño and carrots. And I’m gonna tell you something… I love pickled jalapeños and carrots. And it turns out that if you go during the day, they have all kinds of awesome shit on the menu that you can’t get at 3am.

5. Baja Burrito – Nashville, TN


If you’re gonna get a burrito in Nashville, your safest bet is Baja Burrito. Nothing too out of the box here, in terms of burrito building, but they’re the best in town, and they have a pretty great salsa bar, too.

4. Illegal Pete’s – Denver, CO


This place taught me a valuable lesson, and it’s a lesson that every other burrito place should learn. Mix the damned shit that goes into the burrito. Seriously. You have a bunch of warm stuff going onto the tortilla first, and then comes the cold-ass cheese, sour cream, guac, lettuce (if you’re gross), and pico (if you just like gnawing on a raw onion and tomato that somebody half-mamma-birded to you) that just sits on top, waiting to ruin your entire day like a cold wet blanket.  All you have to do is add one more 10 second step and mix all the ingredients before wrapping it up, and the cheese can get to melting and the other stuff isn’t just a Cold Pocket (like a Hot Pocket ®, but even less exciting) nightmare glob waiting to shit on your coveted burrito time. Atta boy, Illegal Pete.

3. Izzo’s Illegal Burrito – Baton Rouge, LA


This place used to be the top of the list, but they started losing their grip somewhere along the way. It was probably about the time they started spreading out of their hometown of Baton Rouge. Their habanero sauce, which was once the best around, kinda took a dive, and they started losing the concept of ingredient ratios. However, on their best days, I’d put them up against any burrito around. And that’s why they’re so far up the list… potential for a comeback.

2. Cosmic Cantina – Durham, NC


So, holy shit, this place is incredible. And they’ve got a trick that nobody else does. They put the cheese on the tortilla when they drop it in the tortilla steamer thing so it melts while the tortilla is doing it’s business… clever girl… Also, their habanero sauce is damn near perfect.

1. Cabo Bob’s – Austin, TX


Don’t let the “Cabo” and the “Bob’s,” and the fact that it’s premier location is in a Walmart shopping center fool you, this place is a game changer. Best tortillas we’ve ever had. And they grill/smoke their meats on GreenEggs. They make their tortillas right in front of you with this fancy dough squisher contraption, and then throw it on a spinning hot thing (technical term). Also, I don’t think Sammy Hagar has anything to do with this place (not saying we don’t love Hagar… but “I Can’t Drive 55” was a terrible song).

The Protomen are on the road eating burritos across America right now, stopping off tonight in Buffalo. Catch em at one of the following dates:

Apr 19 – Buffalo, NY @ Waiting Room
Apr 20 – Toronto, ON @ Velvet Underground
Apr 25 – Boston, MA @ Middle East
Apr 26 – Philadelphia, PA @ World Cafe Live
Apr 28- Grand Rapids, MI @ Pyramid Scheme
Apr 29 – Indianapolis, IN @ Emerson Theater
Apr 30 – Chicago, IL @ Reggies Live

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