Alright, now here’s something we don’t get a lot of in Rigged features: genuine keyboards. That’s with an “s.” Multiple. Hot Nerds cover the low end with a synthy blast courtesy of Alia Jyawook, who also takes the crown in “best deadpan delivery in a Gear Gods feature.” Not being a keyboardist myself I have never heard of a Mopho befo before, but judging by the Hot Nerds track “Stuffed Party Animals,” from the creeping-up-on-us March 10th release of Strategically Placed Bananas, the Mopho and that other more intimidating keyboard next to it crush out their fair share of subs and angular waveforms when paired with a big ‘ol GK bass rig.


The keys would kind of have to provide a lot of juice to compete with Nathan Joyner’s dual-Hiwatt stack, though. His chain starts with the always distinctive, sometimes fantastic-sounding and sometimes not, Dan Armstrong acrylic guitar. Meanwhile Thomas O’Connell sports a very minimal drum kit that contrasts Joyner and Jyawook’s setups, but considering the level of bash-the-fuck-out-of-it inherent in Hot Nerds’ music I suppose any cymbal count higher than 2 would just get in the way (fuck you guys I count the hi-hats as one cymbal).

Oh, and I’m pretty sure that Bill Bruford snare doesn’t come stock with “Fuck Duck” on the beater head, but I think we can all agree that the world would be a better place if it did.

Those of you looking to get your hands on your own Strategically Placed Bananas (heh) can do so at this location.

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Chris Alfano has written about music and toured in bands since print magazines and were popular. Once in high-school he hacked a friend's QBasic stick figure fighting game to add a chiptune metal soundtrack. Random attractive people still give him high-fives about that.

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