Summer NAMM ’15 – This Douchebag Guitar VAPES. Yes, Really.


As an asthmatic, an aerobic life-form, and a citizen of earth, I am vehemently against all forms of smoking (exceptions made for smoking various meats). I personally think that if someone wants so badly to destroy their own lungs, have at it, I won’t stop you, but smoking necessitates that everyone in the vicinity also suffer, which to me is kind of like lung rape.

So I was actually kind of excited when vaping first started to become popular, because it seemed to eliminate the second-hand smoke hazard. Sure, it smells like melted lollipops, but at least it’s not cigarettes. But there’s a new association with vaping – it’s like a douchebag red flag. There are loads of exceptions – but the general tagline is, Vaping Is For Douchebags.

So when I came across this guitar with a built-in vape pen from Evolution Guitars, my conscious logical mind was having a hard time listening to the description because my associative brain was just screaming DOOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEE! DOUCHE DOUCHE DOUCHE!

The effect is a bit like the fog machine built into Devin Townsend’s insane Framus guitar, but much less pronounced. I dunno how much e-juice costs, but I can’t imagine it being practical for a liver performance. I give them an A for resourcefulness though.

The Evolution Guitars concept, vape aside, is actually pretty cool – any of their guitar tops can be interchanged with another just by loosening some hex bolts and replacing it, electronics and all. Different color finish, different wood, new pickups, the works, in a matter of minutes.

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As Editor-in-Chief of Gear Gods, I've been feeding your sick instrument fetishism and trying unsuccessfully to hide my own since 2013. I studied music on both coasts (Berklee and SSU) and now I'm just trying to put my degree to some use. That's a music degree, not an English one. I'm sure you noticed.