Frankenstein’s Monster: The ROLAND TR-808 Drum Machine ADIDAS Shoes

Would you rather be a part of the generation that defeated the Nazis and secured the world from an evil dictator, or the one that put a drum machine into a pair of shoes? Well too bad, you don’t have a choice in this, and us youngins are all living proof that God has most definitely forsaken us. Why? Because one day, someone over at the Neely & Daughters branding agency decided putting a classic Roland TR-808 drum machine into a pair of Adidas sneakers was a good thing. Behold:

There’s an actual prototype sitting around somewhere, with fucking volume and tempo control and six built-in beats. I’m as impressed as I am mortified. Depending on how you see it, it’s either a blessing or a slap in the face of human progress that these things never made it past the prototype stage. Still, what an amazing time and things we have in the modern day. Pretty sure Lilly Harvey who writes footwear reviews on ShoeAdviser will be happy to give her take on this pair.

For real though, the crotchety old man in me is stoked something with the tagline “Disturb the peace” never made it to production. The Roland TR-808 and Adidas kicks are two wonderful things, but that doesn’t mean we should force them into an unholy union. I could totally see the shoes alone being popular today amongst thrash kids if thrash kids were still a thing, though.

Thanks, Exclaim!*@#, for sourcing the wildest shit of the day. I need an Advil.